Jazzy Jeff & Fresh Prince: "Boom! Shake the Room"

1 September 1993 (with more of the same here)

"This power rap makes Marky Mark sound like Tracey Trace. Boom! will be exploding on turntables everywhere this summer."

— Gavin Reeve

As everyone who has ever had a subscription will tell you, magazines operate on a completely different calendar than the rest of us. I currently subscribe to Mojo, a music mag which specializes in pop's history. Being a British journal and me in the southwest corner of South Korea, each one takes its sweet old time getting to me (particularly the two that never showed up at all). As I write this, I am waiting for the March 2024 issue to arrive. March 2024 at the end of January: only in the world of magazines does this make any sense.

Perhaps this explains why Gavin Reeve predicts that "Boom! Shake the Room" will be exploding on turntables (and, indeed, shaking the rooms they're spinning in) "this summer". In the issue of Smash Hits from the first day of September 1993. Was this a result of oddball magazine dating methods? Or had Gav simply filed his review a few weeks early so that he could follow Temple of the Dog on their tour of southern Europe? Or had he been stuck in the Hits offices burning the candle at both ends that he ceased to notice the passing of the seasons at all?

Granted, it hadn't been much of a summer. Those wet El Nino summers seemed to peak in '93 with rain and flooding a regular part of the weather forecasts and the national news. I'd get up from a nice teenage slumber at ten or eleven in the morning and the dark clouds would just be settling in. You'd get a rare nice day and it would tease you into thinking that it was finally going to turn around and then it would be followed by four days of nothing but showers. July and August had been so miserable that I wasn't even dreading heading back to school.

So, rather than this being played at seaside hops, it was destined for high school discos. And with this return to classes, this meant another season of TV was approaching. (Or at least this was the case in North America; Britain probably didn't get a new crop of sitcoms until early in the new year or something) I was into The Simpsons and Kids in the Hall and already missing The Wonder Years, a show that went off the air just as it seemed poised to deal with Kevin Arnold and Winnie Cooper losing their virginity (the finale implied that they did it in a barn one rainy night following a heated argument but the producers were evidently too squeamish to say so outright). Cheers had wrapped up on my sixteenth birthday with a dismal final episode but people seemed to think its spin-off, centred around the show's least memorable character, had promise. (It ended up not being my thing but everyone else seemed to think that Frasier was "classy" so what the hell do I know?)

The other show I was still just about interested in was The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air even though it was beginning to feel increasingly irrelevant. I don't know if it had a 'Jump the Shark' moment but it hadn't been as good once Will and Carlton had moved on from their fancy prep school to university. Also, it was at this time that a different actress began playing Aunt Viv, a character who had ended the previous season having given birth to a baby boy, signs that the show was beginning to go downhill. It was during this autumn that I began watching Seinfeld which seemed to signal my increasing disinterest in shows like Fresh Prince. In one episode from an earlier season Will is suddenly a basketball star who is being scouted by various colleges: his talent for the sport hadn't mattered a whole lot before and wouldn't be mentioned again. This very season, the cousins attempted to pledge to one of those pathetic American fraternities only for Carlton to be rejected for "not being enough of a brother to be a brother". Though the episode would conclude with the implication that he would be reinstated, this storyline never came up again. Seinfeld never pulled this sort of nonsense. (To be fair, this was also the season in which Will met his deadbeat Dad which proved to be televisual gold)

Fresh Price seemed like the pinnacle for Will Smith. He'd had his novelty hip hop career doing "Parents Just Don't Understand" and "Nightmare on My Street" and "Summertime" alongside chum DJ Jazzy Jeff but they were taken no more seriously than, say, Kid 'N Play, another jokey act of the age that tried to make the crossover into films and TV. There was no reason to think that Smith would be any better at it. Then, Fresh Prince came along and doubters were proved wrong. But as that series dragged on into a very unnecessary fifth season and, from there, an "oh, is this show still on?" sixth, it seemed like Smith was just hanging on. The only thing that held out any promise for him was his film career, especially after his supporting role in Six Degrees of Separation and a co-lead spot in Bad Boys. (That said, it was impossible to foresee that his star would go supernova with Independence Day and Men in Black)

But what about his music, the medium that had got him started in the first place? Well, it had become more and more of an afterthought as his acting career began to take off. "Summertime" gave the duo a memorable 1991 Top 10 hit and it had been a slightly more sophisticated take on their 'boys will be boys' brand of rap and pop, as though they'd been soaking up lots of De La Soul and Jungle Brothers. A harder edge began to creep in too which became more fully realised with "Boom! Shake the Room", as well as much of what would appear on album Code Red. While it was a brave move 

A fair assessment of this record is hard to give. I don't think much of it but I feel like it's as good as Smith and Jazz were capable. Most of the early stuff is too childish to count for much and Smith's subsequent material for soundtracks like Men in Black and Wild Wild West is appalling. Whatever promise they may have had ended up being squandered due to more lucrative pursuits. Being more of a dilettante act, there's the sense that they did the playful stuff, moved over to something more chill and then tried to go hardcore, without actually committing themselves to any one sound. To the extent that they'd ever been serious about their rap careers, by '93 they couldn't quite shake the notion that making music had become almost like a hobby.

On the other hand, "Boom! Shake the Room" is about as serious as they ever got. That's not to say it's any good but at least they were trying to shake off the image of being merry pranksters that had solidified around them ever since the debut of Fresh Prince. Though I've never been much of a hip hop fan, I do occasionally find myself in situations in which I'm digging a bit of old school rap, often while I'm waiting for my wife in a shopping centre. In addition, doing this blog has reminded me of how great Public Enemy and Run DMC were. That said, I can only go so far with this newfound open mindedness: I still don't think much of The Beastie Boys and I remain unconvinced about this hardcore side of Jazzy Jeff & Fresh Prince.

Reeve compares it to Marky Mark which is fitting given that both Mark Wahlberg and Will Smith would both go on to major success in Hollywood following hip hop careers. Marky always tried to sound tough but this only made him seem increasingly feeble; with Smith it's more that his tough side has come out but at the expense of his natural charm that had help make him so popular. In a way, he was right to turn his back on hip hop since he couldn't really be taken seriously no matter what he did; whereas in the movies people loved him as Capt. Steven Hiller, Agent J and Muhammad Ali. He may have lacked range on his records but he faced no similar problem on film.

Though a UK number one smash, as well as a Top 20 hit in North America that everyone quickly forgot all about, Jazzy Jeff & Fresh Prince were no longer needed by 1993. Though much less popular upon release, an album would come out at the end of the year that would make them look silly. Enter the Wu-Tang (36 Chambers) is a deeply influential hip hop recording which introduced the world to the extraordinary production skills of leader The RZA, in addition to launching the careers of Method Man, ODB and Ghostface Killa among others. Some of them didn't need to prove how badass they were while others weren't about to pretend to be something they weren't. The members of Staten Island's Wu-Tang Clan weren't knocking on the doors of Hollywood directors because they had work to be done in hip hop. It was what they were good at. Just as Seinfeld exposed shows like Fresh Prince for the relics that they were, Wu-Tang made us all forget about quaint little rap groups like DJ Jazz Jeff & Fresh Prince.

~~~~~

Also Reviewed This Fortnight

James: "Sometimes"

The band that I always quite liked (though never enough for me to go out and buy any of their albums) returned in '93 not with "Laid", the single that just about broke them in North America, but with "Sometimes", a song with a pair of significant strikes against it. First, the title is unoriginal; with the possible exception of "Stay", no single word has been done to death in terms of song name. More problematic is the "Sometimes I look in your eyes and see your soul..." line which should prompt everyone to wretch. Should. Luckily, James was and is led by Tim Booth, an unconventionally charismatic bloke with just the right amount of cleverness and passion in his rather overlooked voice to pull it off. The backing vocalists — who, according to Wikipedia, are legend Brian Eno and a lass called Martine McDonagh — sound sickening pleased by the sentiment but Booth is just too caught up in the whirl of romance and pop joy and gives a fantastic performance. Not quite their absolute best but one I quite like from that band I quite like — not that I would've gone out and bought it or anything.

New Order: "World (The Price of Love)"

18 August 1993

"They've a good army of followers — and I'm one of them."

— Toby Anstis

At one point when I was still on Twitter, a scan of Neil Tennant's review of New Order's supposedly seminal 1983 album Power, Corruption and Lies in Smash Hits did the social media rounds. Though he wasn't overly complementary in his analysis, he didn't completely slag it off either. (A score of 6½ out of 10 isn't quite in 'shitting all over it' territory, is it?) His main criticism was that while New Order were capable of crafting sublime singles, their albums tended to leave a lot to be desired. While Power, Corruption and Lies happened to be just their second LP, he somehow happened to be looking ahead to the many patchy albums they'd record in the future. (Technique is probably the only one that is strong from top to bottom)

This didn't sit well with some on music Twitter. Many seemed to think that because the Pet Shop Boys were inferior to New Order that Tennant shouldn't judge. While they're tastes are wrong, even granting them the premise is flawed. By their logic only The Beatles and Miles Davis are in a position to evaluate the musical worth of anyone else. What's more, if other (future) pop stars have no business knocking others than what of the rest of us?

The one minor problem I have with Tennant's point is that it overlooks the fact that not every New Order single hit the mark either. Early records like "Procession" and "Thieves Like Us" are nothing special. "State of the Nation" is forgettable and "Touched by the Hand of God" is really only saved by the priceless video. And then there's "Ruined in a Day" and "World", neither of which could have hoped to adequately follow the brilliant "Regret" even if they both weren't so wretchedly ordinary.

I bought the Republic album during the spring of 1993 having not heard even a snippet of any of its eleven cuts. Nevertheless, I felt obliged to purchase it, even if I had to pause when I noticed A NEWORDER RELEASE emblazoned at the top of the cover. ("So, this is New Order album, right?") "Regret" instantly made it all worthwhile but getting through the remainder of it proved to be more of a slog. "World" was its second track and I wasn't overly fond of it, especially the backing singers who I felt would have been more at home on a Jason Donovan record. I listened to the first side of Republic and wasn't grabbed by any of it. It was only with side 2 opener "Young Offender" that I could hear a potential second single, something which wouldn't have mattered to the old New Order who seldom bothered including 45's on their LP's.

I wasn't to know it at the time since I seldom purchased singles and disliked most of the 12" mixes I'd heard but "World" did have an ace up its sleeve. The Perfecto mix which would later appear on the 1995 compilation The Rest of New Order turned out to be something of a banger. Revamped by legendary English DJ and producer Paul Oakenfold, it was very much the same song only with more polish and a little more muscle during the instrumental breaks. "This is how it should have sounded all along," I said to myself the first time I put it on. This is no mean feat for a remix: around the same time the Pet Shop Boys put out retooled cuts of both "I Wouldn't Normally Do This Kind of Think" and "Yesterday, When I Was Mad" from their Very album both of which ended up sounding far too cluttered and messy compared to the originals. DJ's like to leave their mark but more often than not it's best if they enhance the record they're tasked with remixing rather than altering it beyond recognition.

This expertly done Perfecto mix highlights the fact that the world no longer needed New Order. This was something that virtually everyone who still remained from the heyday of eighties' synth-pop had to come to terms with in 1993. Depeche Mode accepted the new reality and recorded a messy, grungy alternative album Songs of Faith and Devotion (a favourite among those who prefer the indie side of the Basildonians to their pop sound; suffice it to say I am not one of them) while the Pet Shop Boys doubled down with a work that was them in all their arch-pop glory (it was said to have been 'Very Pet Shop Boys'). Meanwhile, Erasure became even more insufferably serious than they already were. Notably, the only one who didn't have a number one album in '93 and '94 was New Order.

Although I was unaware of this at the time, New Order's days were numbered even prior to the recording of Republic. "World" indicates that this is a unit that was no longer able to coalesce the way they had so effortlessly on "Blue Monday" and "True Faith". Bernard Sumner had been working with Johnny Marr and noted New Order basher New Tennant and the lyrics and melodies he brought back with him sound like vintage Electronic. Worse yet, they sounded like vintage Electronic rejects. The democratic unity of old seemed to have been replaced by four individuals content to do their own thing, contributing only when it suited them.

There is so much to admire and like about New Order that it's actually quite easy to overlook their flaws. The sense that they seemed to think that they were above all this pop caper was annoying but it also reflected their inability to consistently put out magnificent records. While Tennant and Lowe soaked up influences particularly from various subgenres of dance music, Sumner and bandmates Peter Hook, Gillian Gilbert and Stephen Morris seemed incapable of appreciating anything remotely commercial. And then there's the word salad lyrics delivered by the pedestrian-voiced Sumner: while at times the nonsense words sung by a workmanlike vocalist could actually work it was always hit and miss.

~~~~~

Also Reviewed This Fortnight

The Proclaimers: "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)"

Previously a number eleven hit in the autumn of 1988, "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)" enjoyed an unexpected second wind up the charts after being featured in the Johnny Depp-Mary Stuart Masterson picture Benny & Joon. By "charts" I'm referring to the American Hot 100 and the Canadian RPM listing where it peaked at numbers three and four respectively. As for Britain, this re-release didn't even make a token appearance at the bottom end of the chart. But no matter since it would be back. The British would eventually take it to number one for Comic Relief while in North America it was used in the sitcom How I Met Your Mother as the cassingle that was stuck inside Marshall's Fiero. While Ted got sick of it on their roadtrip across the USA, it eventually came around again and he was once again singing along. It happens to all of us.

Prince: "1999"

20 January 1983

"I first heard this at a disco and decided it was probably the Jacksons."

— Dave Rimmer

I turned six in the spring of '83 so I'm probably not the best judge but I can't believe that people were giving much thought to the millennium back then. I recall first hearing about the return of the Hong Kong colony to China a few years later — I was a news buff at a fairly young age — and thinking that 1997 was so way off in the future that it hardly merited consideration.The fact that the year 2000 and the millennium was approaching didn't occur to me until the mid-nineties when everyone began talking about Y2K and, in my pedantic family at least, how 2001 was the year everyone should be recognizing since "there wasn't a year zero". (It never occurred to us that there really had never been a year one either and that the calendar is a fabrication but that's a whole other matter) But to adults it was fast approaching — assuming humanity was going to survive long enough to see it.

The Bomb was something everyone heard about back in the day but it wasn't something I was particularly afraid of. (I was far more scared of volcanoes, that huge hole in the Ozone Layer and those disgusting slugs on the coast of British Columbia) We never did nuclear war readiness drills in school and Communism may not have seemed quite so threatening at a time when the world of Reagan and Thatcher was so bleak. To the older generation, however, the threat of nuclear war was still very much in the air. While some went out and protested, others were getting down and enjoying those few precious days that they had left. People like Prince.

"1999" is the beginning of Prince's ascendancy to pop's aristocracy. The fun-sized genius had his moments prior to this (as Dave Rimmer mentions, "I Wanna Be Your Lover" is a prime example) but this is where he kicks off the work that he'll always be remembered for. I've long had mixed feelings towards him myself. I admire his willingness to do his thing without thought for anyone else, his immense talent and the fact that he was always so balls out prolific in an era when more and more of his contemporaries were going three or four or five years between albums. As for his music, his songs have never thrilled me quite as much as I feel they ought to (the closest was probably when I first heard either "When Does Cry" or "Purple Rain" and even then I was too young and weirded out by his image) and I've never been too crazy about his weedy voice. I can take him in small doses but that's about enough. I can't pretend to like him more than that even if it flies in the face of the critical consensus.

Appearing on every good Prince compilation, "1999" is one of those ones I can happily give a listen to, even if I hadn't actually done so since the last time I dealt with it in this space. Taking the same snappy melody that he would put to good use on "Manic Monday" a couple years later (I must say I'd never noticed but clearly others have picked up on it for some time), he and his soon-to-be-christened band The Revolution pump out a saucy funk rhythm that really provides the blueprints for the emerging new jack swing movement — Janet Jackson's still awesome Rhythm Nation being something repeated plays of this really put me in the mood for. Fantastic and something that Prince may have never bettered.

It's odd to think there was a time when one might mistake a Prince record for the organization which Michael Jackson was still ostensibly a member of but it's not quite as crazy as it seems at first glance. For one thing, the sweet, brotherly harmonies of the Jackson 5 may have given them an impressive run of hits in the early part of the seventies but jump forward a decade later and their work had become much more individual. There's also the fact that the vocals on "1999" are divided up between Prince and Revolution members Coleman, Dez Dickerson and Jill Jones. (For my part, I thought it was a trio of singers, not being award of Jones at all; this tells you how much of a Prince fan I am!) Given that the Purple Perv was already known for playing a multitude of instruments and it probably wouldn't have surprised people to discover he was something of a control freak, hearing him share the singing might have surprised a few people. Why would one assume it to be Prince at all? I wouldn't necessarily have guessed the Jacksons but I understand the confusion.

The end of the Cold War is now past its thirtieth anniversary but "1999" is still relevant due to the imminent threat of climate change. It's looking more and more as if the damage is irreversible and it's only going to get worse. Maybe it'll soon be time for humanity to accept that its days are numbered. Partying like it's 2999 might be all we have left.

~~~~~

Also Reviewed This Weekend

Kajagoogoo: "Too Shy"

Given that he has to be dragged from the spotlight, it's impossible to imagine Limahl being Too Shy in any situation. (Exactly how many lame British reality shows hosted by Ant & Dec has he been in so far? I honestly have no idea but I'd bet it's in the several "range") Good thing, then, that he's singing about someone else so good on him for not pretending to be the vulnerable, Prince-sized vocalist lost in a sea of much taller and more musical bandmates. And about the rest of Kajagoogoo: well done to that lot for not being the typical above-all-this-pop-nonsense prog rockers that the likes of Nik Kershaw and Howard Jones clearly were; the video makes it look like they're enjoying themselves just as much as Limahl himself. And well done for having a UK number one and a pretty big hit around the world which is still well-remembered to this day. All that said, "Too Shy" isn't all that good. Rimmer hates it but I just mildly dislike it. But, as I say, well done to all concerned.

(Click here to see my original review)

Apache Indian: "Boom Shack-a-Lack"

4 August 1993

"Apache's belly-wriggler is fabber than Shabba and shaggier than Shaggy, and his Brummie raggamuffin beat is a dance hall dream come true."

— Tony Cross

Showier than Snow

Let's be honest: the man born Darrin O'Brien who hailed from Toronto was not half as naff as many of us thought. No, he did not suck to anywhere near the extent of Vanilla Ice, the white-bred rap superstar with whom he was typically compared. Nevertheless, while "Informer" is all right, it's no "Boom Shack-a-Lack". While the former deals with Snow's criminal past, it doesn't help that he undermines the seriousness with those "a-licky boom boom now" absurdities. "Boom Shack-a-Lack" is all about doing some dance or getting down to the new "stylee" but delivered with authority. Why not frighten and entertain at once?

Flyer than Pliers

There were many, many, many Chaka Demus & Pliers hits back in '93 and '94. They all seemed to come from the same album that featured the pair looking like gangsta rappers on the cover; not that I needed to buy Tease Me since their hits seemed to pop up on every Now That's What I Call Music compilation back then. Their brand of dancehall reggae could be good fun but it could also go a very long way, making them well-suited to all those Nows. They couldn't possibly match the ferocity of "Boom Shack-a-Lack" which is also happens to be as fun a romp as anything the Jamaican duo was capable of. Plus, that guttural, dirty sound of Apache Indian is the real noise of the streets.

Maxier than Maxi

Oh, how I once hoped for so much from Maxi Priest. His cover of "Wild World" remains a delight while his American number one smash "Close to You" really made it seem like his was going to be huge. I'm sure he did all right for himself though. Granted, Apache Indian didn't end up having the "legs" for a sustained run of hits either but when you've got a smash hit like "Boom Shack-a-Lack" then you can take it to the max(i) and never look back.

As...Asw...Wad... (something, something) than Aswad

They say Aswad once meant something. They used to headline those 'Rock Against Racism' shows (often, funnily enough, as one of the few acts of colour on the bill). Later, they would finally become a chart act by putting out some of the most milquetoast reggae you'll ever hear. Mind you, I don't hate all of it but my indifference is such that I don't care to ever hear them again. Apache Indian doesn't "do" indifference. He tweaks indifference in the nose. He pisses all over it. You want indifference? Find religion!

Slobbier than Blobby

Or not. But a hot reggae-ish novelty song from Apache Indian could've potentially given "Mr. Blobby" a run for its money in the '93 Christmas Number One stakes. If only...

More 40-fied than UB-bloody-40

The low hanging fruit but one I'm more than happy to barely stretch my arms out to grab hold of. "King", "One in Ten", "Rat in Mi Kitchen" and "Kingston Town" are all great but their descent into cover version hell ruined those fleeting moments in which UB-bloody-40 wasn't Britain's ghastliest band. "(I Can't Help) Falling in Love with You" might have given them yet another chart topper but who with an interest in exploring music, in having their minds expanded, could have opted for it over "Boom Shack-a-Lack". Not so much music for people who don't like music; more like music for people who are dead inside.

~~~~~

Also Reviewed This Fortnight

SWV: "Right Here (Human Nature Remix)"

Voguer than En Vogue

The original version of "Right Here" is perfectly acceptable R&B pop of the age. Michael Jackson's "Human Nature" from Thriller isn't quite up to the standard of Jacko's dancefloor masterworks but it is one of his stronger heart-tuggers, a type of song he didn't always nail. Together, however, the two make magic. That sampled Jackson wail gives "Right Here" a dream-like, floating vibe that is impossible to resist. En Vogue may have been more memorable and TLC had charisma and songcraft but SWV had something as well. They had Jacko for a start.

Stan: "Suntan"

21 July 1993

"There's no poncing around with a band called Stan. Coppertone-tastic."

— Pete "Ladeez" Stanton

We're now more than halfway through the batch of '93 Singles of the Fortnight Best New Singles. Considering this was the first year in quite a while in which I all but gave up on current music, it's not been half bad so far. Saint Etienne's "You're in a Bad Way", New Order's "Regret" and R.E.M.'s "Nightswimming" have been the obvious highlights but Arrested Development's "Mr. Wendal", East 17's "Deep" and Terence Trent D'Arby's "Do You Love Me Like You Say?" are also very good. The rest aren't really to my taste but I understand them all being selected. But they can't all be winners, can they?

As they say, timing is everything in pop. It's easy to imagine the duo behind Stan figuring they had a sure-fire smash since Right Said Fred had been such a cog in British culture. "I'm Too Sexy", "Don't Talk Just Kiss" and "Deeply Dippy" had all reached the UK Top 3 in 1991 and '92 so why not do something that taps that same well — and have it be about summer to boot! A licence to print money, surely. UK record buyers, meet Stan.

There were only two problems with this. First, the novelty of RSF had already begun to wear off on a public that needed an interlude before embracing Mr. Blobby the following Christmas. That February they put out Comic Relief single "Stick It Out" which, despite being neither funny nor particularly tuneful, gave them a fourth Top 5 hit but it happened to be the last gasp of Fred-mania. (Further singles failed to make much of an impression including a sad and shameless "tribute" to Sonic the Hedgehog called "Wonderman") So, things didn't look up for a less talented, less charismatic equivalent. Which leads us to the other major issue affecting Stan: they sucked something awful.

Yet, Smash Hits scribe Pete Stanton found something to like in "Suntan" when he could have selected one of the many superior offerings among the new releases. ("La Tristesse Durera" would have been a good choice, even if there have been more than enough Manics records as it is; failing that, any of Michelle Gayle (see below), Janet Jackson, Kim Appleby and a duo known as Ali & Frazier with a brave and surprisingly good cover of the Althea & Donna classic "Uptown Top Ranking" would've sufficed) He helpfully offers a few reasons for his oddball selection.

1) "A lively pop beat that would get grandad off the sofa and on his feet"

My granddad would never have got on his feet for this. He would get up for several things (a bologna sandwich for one) and he was on his feet quite a bit. He went for walks every morning and was willing to stand put at the sink do the dishes even though he came from an era in which men weren't expected to help out with the housewife's duties. I don't know about you but if a pop record had been able to entice a grandpa up for a gig around the rumpus room then I'd be suspicious. But not only were the elderly not interested, nor was the rest of the human race.

2) "Perfect seasonal timing"

Is it though? The Mama's & The Papa's "California Dreamin'" is about living through a miserable winter and dreaming about being in the sun. We don't need to hear about sunshine and suntans and bikinis in the summer because we already have them at that time of the year. On the other hand, the weather in '93 was pretty horrible. It was one of those god awful El Nino years in which it rained a lot but that only makes "Suntan" even worse. The thought that there could be others out there enjoying their summer when the rest of us were stuck inside with bugger all to do is too much to take.

3) "An original and quirky band name"

I suppose I'll give Pete this one. There is something comically mundane about 'Stan'. You can't just take any old Christian name and use it for your group. Take Ricky, a British band from about twenty years ago. It matters not that they got their name from the Rickenbacker guitar since all the rest of us can think of is that weedy kid in school who somehow was part of the popular crowd in spite of lacking the looks, style and athletic prowess which somehow made him even worse than those who did possess sufficient looks, style and/or athletic prowess. Guys called Stan aren't especially cool but they aren't dweebs either. Housemartins' guitarist Stan Cullimore is the prototypical Stan: he sports glasses and isn't much to look at but he still made Hits writer Sylvia Patterson's heart go all gooey. Those Stans, eh? They got it going on and they don't even know it!

Yet, their name can't save this lousy stinker of a record. I've spent the past few days trying to think of a worse entry on this blog and I'm not sure there is one. Limahl's "Love in Your Eyes" may be the closest but the only thing there is that Tom Hibbert almost certainly gave it his seal of approval just to troll the Smash Hits readership. Patti Smith's version of "So You Want to Be a Rock 'n' Roll" star is a mighty misstep for the punk icon (even if she's kind of overrated to begin with) but I wouldn't be so quick to turn it off. Fidelfatti featuring Ronette's "Just Wanna Touch Me" isn't great but it suffers mainly due to it being selected by Miranda Sawyer over "Fools Gold". Oceanic's "Wicked Love" is another one I didn't care for but at least I've gone on to forget all about it. No, "Suntan" is really a step up in terms of SOTF wretchedness.

It could've been worse though. "Suntan" might have caught on and subjected more of us to its non-existent "charms". Stan could've had a Fred-like run of hits to get on the public's wick. This proved to be the upside of Top of the Pops and their new policy of giving more time to established hits: sleeper singles such as this one stood little chance since they would pop in for a lowly Top 40 cup of coffee only to disappear the following week. The punters really didn't get a look in. This proved disadvantageous to up and coming indie bands who could've used a hit but at least we were spare this shite. Small mercies.

~~~~~

Also Reviewed This Fortnight

Michelle Gayle: "Looking Up"

Formerly of the north London secondary school duo Fresh 'n' Fly with chum Ronnie Birtles, the former Fiona Wilson moved from Grange Hill to Albert Square under the assumed identity of Hattie Tavernier (yes, it sounds made up probably because it was) before embarking on a full time pop career that should have amounted more than a handful of hits for a young woman now known as Michelle Gayle. While "Sweetness" from the following year is quite a bit stronger, "Looking Up" has its charms. The opening sounds like every American R&B tune of the age but it doesn't take long to get going. Gayle's voice is tremendous though she is in need of better material. "Looking Up" is a fine debut but it does have the ring of a diminishing returns fourth single or album cut that wasn't deemed strong enough to be released as a 45. Still, it sounds great after listening to nothing but bloody "Suntan" all week.

Tracey Thorn: "Goodbye Joe" / "Plain Sailing"

6 January 1983

"Everything But The Girl chanteuse Thorn provides all vocals and instruments and artfully assumes the kind of breathy, mysterious tone of the '50s solo girl singers she doubtless greatly admires."

— Mark Ellen, probably

It must frustrate pop critics to no end how the acts they frequently tip for the big time end up not quite getting there. Obviously there are many better examples covered just in this blog than Everything but the Girl even if it took the duo some time before they began to score hits — and even then, chart action was something that came and went for them until their massive 1995 breakthrough "Missing". Yet, there was so much potential there that journalists and other musicians could see that otherwise went unrecognized by the public at large — until they inevitably caught on.

Mark Ellen (the presumed reviewer this fortnight who must've been feeling more comfortable in a state of anonymity) cites Tracey Thorn as being from Everything but the Girl but it is likely that her better-known project of the time was Marine Girls, a group that the singer had formed with school friend Gina Hartman. Though only in their late-teens, they had already issued in the album Beach Party in 1981. Still, with Thorn heading up to Hull for university, Marine Girls would be on hiatus but she remained signed to indie label Cherry Red as a solo artist. It was there she met label mate Ben Watt with whom she would form Everything but the Girl.

So, let's take stock: Tracey Thorn, solo artist; Ben Watt, solo artist; Marine Girls, group; Everything but the Girl, group. All signed to the same hip record label and all seemingly being given equal attention. This is not a rock band with extra curricular projects floating about during off periods, it's almost as if Thorn and Watt were hedging their bets. As Johnny Black says in the 1984 Smash Hits Yearbook, EBTG was "not so much a group, more a kind of ongoing creative liaison". Black concludes the piece by wondering which musical project will end up having hits first.

The double A side of "Goodbye Joe" and "Plain Sailing" proves that it could just as easily have been Thorn on her own. With all due respect to Gina Hartman, Ben Watt and Paul Weller, her talent is sufficient to craft remarkable pop. Neither of these sides had much in the way of commercial potential but it should have been clear to all that she had the voice, the musical chops and the command of pop. In one way or another, she was going to take off eventually.

Originally laced with irony by The Monochrome Set, "Goodbye Joe" is given a mournful treatment as performed by Thorn. Silly, inconsequential fun in its original form becomes stately here. While it could be said that she manages to strangle all the humour out of it, perhaps one of Thorn's great talents is to find the tracest elements of sorrow and tragedy in even the most trivial of songs and still manage to avoid self-righteousness or melodrama. She also plays a precision guitar solo, the sort of which provided the foundation for Belle & Sebastian's very existence. (Her partner Watt was meanwhile busy inventing everything that made Norwegian duo Kings of Convenience worthwhile)

Its companion piece, "Plain Sailing", is equally affecting. First released on her '82 solo debut A Distant Shore, the original version is full of echo and has a sparseness that goes with all-acoustic, no-special-guests works. Redone for the legendary 99p Cherry Red compilation Pillows & Prayers, it has sleigh bells (or bells of some kind) added to help give it a breezier pace. They're a welcome decorative touch and one that doesn't feel crassly commercial. Yes, I know we're supposed to appreciate the rawness of indie darlings recording on a shoestring but the single release is more professional and fleshed-out without sacrificing any of the original's beauty.

Only Thorn's vocals give an indication of what was coming and that was jazz pop. It took a little longer to catch than Ellen predicts but it eventually would. It may have come as Marine Girls or as Everything but the Girl or as Tracey Thorn herself but it was bound to happen.

~~~~~

Also Reviewed This Fortnight

The Box: "No Time for Talk" (aka The Box EP)

Not to be confused with the Montreal new wave band of the same name. Turns out, this lot are the much better Box. Sounding as if the Art Ensemble of Chicago had decided to dabble in amphetamine-fueled post-punk, I was expecting something of a slow burn but I was drawn in about halfway through my first listen. Ellen isn't terribly impressed ("It's a lot more challenging to try and make records you can actually listen to") but it's thrilling in places and I'm quite pleased that there was someone out there looking to merge free jazz with modern sounds, rather than more mellow and trendier styles the way Weekend (and indeed Everything but the Girl) had gone about it. Not the sort of thing I'd listen to on a regular basis but this Box deserves props for trying out something that no one else had the nerve to do themselves.

(Click here to see my original review)

R.E.M.: "Nightswimming"

7 July 1993

"I know it's boring always making R.E.M. records Best New Single but if they persist in being so wonderful, what do you expect?"

— Mark Frith

"Drive" ⭐

"Man on the Moon" ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonite" ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"Everybody Hurts" ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"Nightswimming" ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"Find the River" ⭐⭐⭐⭐

This is how all six of the singles from R.E.M.'s Automatic for the People were rated in the increasingly indie-averse Smash Hits. Simply put, they were crushing it. Only a pair of Singles of the Fortnight Best New Singles but two more came within inches and I have to wonder if fear of overdoing the praise kept them from claiming the crown more. Those four all received the full five star treatment (even if ver Hits for whatever reason used circles, which may or may not have been moons, in place of stars) with "Find the River" getting a more than respectable four. Only "Drive" and its one star stands out from the pack — and this was likely down to a misprint since guest reviewer Rob Newman has only good things to say about it (as opposed to his feelings of vitriol towards R.E.M.'s self-important fans; what must he think of U2's fanbase?)

This sextet didn't exactly cause chart dominance for them but their's was the triumph of records which were more than the sum of their parts. Though "Find the River" missed the Top 40 entirely — and honestly, who would have needed it at the end of '93, especially since they seldom put fresh B sides on their singles by this point? — the rest performed well enough but the real beneficiary was its parent album.

R.E.M.'s eighth studio album seemed set to repeat the trajectory of predecessor Out of Time. Both debuted at number one then spent the next few months drifting around the Top 10. But while "Losing My Religion" and "Shiny Happy People" were both global hits, subsequent singles from Out of Time fared less well, with "Near Wild Heaven" and "Radio Song" spending a total of three weeks in the Top 40 combined; the 45s from Automatic, however, had greater legs, especially when "Everybody Hurts" came out in the spring of 1993. About six months after first hitting the top of the album chart, Automatic was back at number one and it would go on to enjoy two more non-consecutive weeks at the summit. It was still in the Top 10 that summer as fifth single "Nightswimming" gave it yet another second wind.

It was by this point that Bill Berry, Peter Buck, Mike Mills and Michael Stipe must have known that they had become far more popular in Britain than they were back home in the US. (Whether or not they cared is a whole other matter) Out of Time had been their long-awaited breakthrough in the States with its two signature hits both Top 10 radio staples. Released just a year-and-a-half later, Automatic only managed to peak at number two — stuck behind the immovable behemoth The Chase by Garth Brooks — and its chief singles, "Drive", "Man on the Moon" and "Everybody Hurts" only just made the Top 30. These were perfectly acceptable results but not close to how they were doing across the pond.

"Nightswimming" is every bit as wonderful as Mark Frith claims but it didn't need to be a single beyond further propping up an already best selling album. Like "Try Not to Breathe", "Sweetness Follows" and "Star Me Kitten" it has the whiff of a seriously good deep cut about it, the kind that fans of bands like R.E.M. can't get enough of — and I should know since I'm one of them. With all due respect to "Driver 8" and "The One I Love", they had always been an albums act. (The above-mentioned album tracks could join the likes of "Catapult", "Harborcoat", "Cuyahoga", "You Are the Everything" and "Texarkana" to make up a compilation that would easily rival Eponymous, In Time or any of their many singles-focused collections)

Made up of just Mike Mills on piano along with a string section arranged by former Led Zeppelin bassist John Paul Jones, the stark musical backing really puts the spotlight on an awfully rough-voiced Michael Stipe. I have heard people referring to him being such a great vocalist that he could "sing the phonebook" (something he came awfully close to doing on the eccentric B side "Voice of Harold") but this is down to his phrasings and mannerisms rather than his technical abilities, as "Nightswimming" aptly displays. Yet, this is a strength. A flawless voice would never be able to match the raw vulnerable power of Stipe. On something like the annoyingly catchy "Stand", that nasally whine can become grating; here it's simply proof that no one else could have been the frontman for R.E.M.

With all I said above about R.E.M. being an albums band, I will tip my hat to this group of phenomenally good singles. "Drive" isn't really my idea of a hit but I do consider it a perfect opening track to rival "Begin the Begin" but the rest are simply magnificent. "Man on the Moon" is poignant even if you have no idea who this "Andy" Stipe is singing about it. "The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonite" is loaded with lyrics I get wrong but it is that rarest of songs that I'm happy to have stuck in my head. "Everybody Hurts" remains as heartbreaking as ever. And "Nightswimming" is a peerless torch song wonder. I'll be getting to "Find the River" before long but I will say that I'm convinced my beloved Pet Shop Boys used it as the basis for their outstanding song "Luna Park" from their return to form 2006 album Fundamental. The best albums don't always have ace singles and great singles often crop up on less than stellar albums but Automatic for the People is so brilliant that it had it all. They couldn't possibly persist in making them so wonderful forever but it's nice to bask in the glow of a time when R.E.M. was a streets ahead of the competition.

~~~~~

Also Reviewed This Fortnight

Take That: "Pray"

Take That would be one of my guilty pleasures but for the fact that I don't feel the least bit ashamed for liking them. Earlier efforts were a mixed a bag but "Pray" set everything right. In a UK music scene that had finally rid itself of Stock Aitken Waterman, it's strange to discover their patented sound given a nineties sheen courtesy of Gary Barlow. Frith likens it to previous hit "Why Can't I Wake Up with You?" but the That wisely dialed back on the depressing American-style R&B for its follow-up. They took their time getting that long sought after number one hit but everyone must have known this would be the one that would put them over the top which would only be confirmed when "Pray" entered the charts all the way in the top spot. Why America passed on this I'll never know.